Attract (not attack!) others to agree with you.

If you are in the business of changing people’s minds, you would have to make friends with this one fundamental facet of human psyche: the resistance to change.

Priests, preachers, politicians, teachers and mentors are all in the business of giving advice that to influence people’s beliefs and attitudes in order to hopefully improve them to become better humans.

But here’s the challenge:

“People don’t change unless they want to.”

Seth Godin recently touched on this and said:

Humans are unique in their ability to willingly change. We can change our attitude, our appearance and our skillset.

But only when we want to.

The hard part, then, isn’t the changing it.

It’s the wanting it.

And we tend to use our rational parts of the brain to explain, argue and persuade others to change their strongly held beliefs. An almost impossible task.

We don’t generally start with assuming they might not want the change we are proposing and work towards making them want it badly. That is the real task, not pounding fact after fact on to them. And we can use the help of one of the oldest “change catalysts” known to mankind: a story.

James Clear recently tweeted:

Stories change more minds than facts. The way to change someone’s mind is not to present them with overwhelming evidence but to motivate them with overwhelming emotion. (Ideally, you’d have truth on your side and a story worth spreading.)

A lot of us hear something *smart* like this and wonder if it really works in practice. Here’s a video about Mr. Rogers that shows how it is done with the power of using emotion (and stories) vs facts in arguments.

There’s probably no better case study or a “how-to” guide on the planet which can teach you how to attract (not attack!) others to agree with you.